My power, mine!

So much effort and such enthusiasm goes in to the secondary that primary gets forgotten in the run. It is not conditioning of the mind, but replacing a habit and replacing is not same as removing.

That comes to my mind when I hear some one suggesting physical activity as a way to let out some “steam”. So much of health and fitness has become a trend. It is not, by any means, a wrong thing at all but when it comes to the real vigour, the real strength, the real power I think we as a modern civilisation fall back by miles when it comes to mental health.

Put your anger into workout, that is common phrase that I have actually heard people say. No doubt the concentration, the motivation, the hard work required in any physical activity helps discipline the body to get over physical barriers thus making one stronger even mentally, but I do not agree with the following statements…

“Have too much pressure built up? Go punch the bag.”
“Got too much on your mind? Put in your music and jog around.”

What is this if not a new habit of compulsively letting the steam out each time it builds up? Just replacing all the sighing, sulking and whining with lifting weights or punching the bag – I am not sure of the approach, sounds like yet another addition to our quest of finding peace out there.

When I hear some one suggesting physical activity as a stress reliever. I always get confused because we are not really letting out or getting completely over something instead we are putting it all away and that is as worse as it can get. To put all your feelings and emotions aside and then burning out when dealing with it all at once is not good idea.

You can find a million ways to put those feelings aside and get the adrenaline rush to help you get over something for a while. Natural rush is better than alcohol – agreed! But it is a dependence nonetheless. And that is no power. It is all in the head and I have learnt that primary (mental) makes secondary (physical) stronger.

Your power, yours! It lies in getting over a problem not in getting around it.

The Prime.

Golden Age: If you had to live forever as either a child, an adolescent, or an adult, which would you choose — and why?

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A little timid, but very active.
A little shy, but quite crazy.
A lot of happiness, and no stress.
A little nudge and I woke up fresh.
That is how the child in me lived.

A little confident, but a little tired.
A little outgoing, but quite busy.
A lot more stress, and no rest.
A little daunting and it felt like a test.
That is how the teenager in me lived.

A little open minded, but a little unsure.
A little stubborn, but quite easy going.
A lot more learning, and no break.
A little tough and it feels like I am always awake.
That is how the young adult is…

And I would say this is the best stage of life. You have the knowledge, the health, the strength, the will power, the passion/fire, the time, may be even money and support/love of your family and friends that would keep you going on. One or the other tends to missing in the stages preceding and succeeding the young adults age. No wonder it is called the prime!

It’s a trap.

From You to You: Write a letter to your 14-year-old self.

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Dear Insach

Hi, I hope everything is going great. This is @insach21,  21 is the age when you will start blogging and @ signifies the way people would communicate in your future. The use of @ and # would not only show how updated you are with trend or how cool you are, but also it will serve as a tool on various platforms to make yourself heard among million other people who…. errr… ummm.. care about what you have to say.

Anyway, as a reply to a daily prompt (you will know what a prompt is, in next 7 years) this letter is being written to you by your older self. So, do not get scared just keep reading even though a lot will not make sense because, you are still in 2008 – the good old times (old for me not for you). I hope you are following.

Let us just cut to the chase. Ok so here is the deal, I know how much you want to grow up and be this and that, and believe me you can be what ever you want to be, everything is allowed in this side of the timeline – a lot of good has come out of it – letting people be themselves. Yes, you guessed it right the future is bright. But….

Butts are very much in fashion in 2015 – another one of those accept everything as fashion/trend rules applies here. But sadly my but is the one with a single ‘t’ oh, yeah the good old “but”, the one that always comes with a bad news. So the future is bright, but growing up is a trap do not fall for it. Live your simple kid life, for you will not get this time ever back again. It is literally a lifetime opportunity and do not hurry to grow up – take it slow.

You will mature with time – in all ways possible. So before you start seeing the black and white of the world, enjoy your time of ignorance because, it is the only time you will feel such bliss. After this phase is gone, you will find out that, life is a twisted road full of surprising, at times not so good, events that somehow you will be held responsible for.

You might even have to do a few things against your virtues, at times you will have to tell the half truth (this way you will keep the guilt of lying afar). You will go through thick and thin and you will change. Yes, the patience and calmness will be tested so many times that you will be filled with short lived frustrations, and anger – a constant pain in the butt. This change will be painful, but you will get through it smoothly.

Nevertheless,you will come out as a stronger person who would not only believe but preach that it’s one life we get and it shouldn’t be wasted in fret (ting). Yup, the trying and testing would be on a daily basis because, the world does not let goodness prevail and holding on to your self, your beliefs will be the hardest thing in the future.

Just learn to LOL but in a literal way. It will help a lot.

Yours Yourself

Insach 2015!

Quite close.

Futures Past: As a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up? How close or far are you from that vision?

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Doctor… Bio-technologist… Biotech-research-support.

Now, that has been the journey. I wanted the first one, got the second one – loved it and picked up research, but soon the plans changed. Now, I am the third. As a young boy, I was one of those clueless kids that had only one answer to the question – “what do you want to be when you grow up?” Even when I had not a clue about it, I was sure  in my own way.

A gift from 2010 being used now 🙂

Every time I was asked that, doctor was my reply.

And I have been lucky enough to be on the same lines.

No, I am not a doctor – but someone on their side .

Anyhow, I did get the right opportunities.

Or may be I never let any slip by.

For all I did was wait and try.

Tried as many times as I could.

Never backed down even when alone I stood.

Patience has been the only way out.

It took time, it got tough. Felt a little hopeless.

And now it might not be the best.

But who’d have guessed – it’d be nothing like the rest.

The prompt has come on a perfect time. Recently, I started my first job ever after graduating last December – it has been some ride – but greater good is what we all want and I will take this as the very first step. My laptop is Kaput, it will take 2-3 weeks to get it fixed, hence the break from blogging. But you can always blog from your office, specially when you are new/trainee you tend to get bored. Sshh…. this is our little secret.

But it’s true…

A Mystery Wrapped in an Enigma: Tell us something most people probably don’t know about you.

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Firstly, I would like to mention that, It has been a year since I joined word-press and I have done better than I could have imagined. I started blogging as an activity to kill time, but instead have gotten hooked on to it and have learned so much from so many. It is always a treat to read the blogs that I follow. Also, I am not like a full time blogger because of my other commitments. Nevertheless, It’s been a good ride.

Now to focus on today’s prompt I’ll have to put it all out. I hope it’s not oversharing, it makes me feel vulnerable however. Well, even after all the understanding I have gained in these past years and after rising from it all, I have kept a few things secret (like any normal person). None of them is that bad but I guess one of the secrets has, in some way, a feeling of embarrassment linked to it. We all know the world can live without knowing our small or big secrets.

Although, I am like an open book – trying to be a simple person, living a humble lifestyle – my family and friends would definitely back that up, I have had dark days too. And if I choose to share it here, in a way I am sharing it with the world. Anyway, here it goes… bullying (period). I have grown up enough to be not bothered by it or its memories, but it scars you forever. Not like I am paranoid all the time but as I was growing up and sometimes even today I get the feeling of being hated or ridiculed. I choose to ignore my feelings from all the over thinking, it is actually a bliss.

But the paranoia is because of a brief episode of name calling and hatred that I faced, which happened in the 6th grade. It is quite common in school time to be called names and made fun of. Everyone has those playful fights, competitions, jealousy etc among the different cliques because there is this entire separate social system at schools. But when all of this fun starts getting hurtful – either emotionally or physically – that is when the matter should be carefully addressed and situation nicely assessed. I changed like 4 schools in total, and have had an amazing time in each one, but my time in junior-high school was crazy. Soon after, we moved into a new city and therefore I had new place to start afresh, and I did so.

STORY: With me, there was some name calling (I did not care) but no physical bullying, except that one time when I was sort of gently “strangled”. I laughed while typing gently but that’s because it is true, the bully (the strongest, most egoistic boy in the class, how stereotypical? But it’s true…) He, only out of anger, held me by my throat (meaning strangled) to scare me not to kill me. Or may be to kill me – I do not know. I only remember being embarrassed and then I started crying, which made him leave me. The incident happened during the recess in the class room with no teacher because, it was a hot summer day and we all were inside. So, once he let me go… There I was down on my knees scared and crying in front of the whole class, which in-turn was even more embarrassing.

No one informed my parents and none of it ever got repeated. However, one teacher got to know about it and scolded him in front of the entire class – talk about pissing a sleeping tiger. After that when the teacher left I do remember him saying something about seeing me dead or the likes. Yeah, I am alive because soon enough life was back to being rainbows and butterflies, until in high school (new school with different people), around the time when I was in 11th grade, my past came to haunt me.

Strangely the event never really bothered me right after it happened as life got normal very quickly, but 5 years later I felt like a loser and felt depressed for no apparent reasons. I had inferiority complex, felt so weak and went through quite a sad phase in life. Oh well, all’s well that ends well. But depression was more painful than being strangled because the anxiety and depression continued for more than 2 years, while the bullying experience had no effect, like two hours later it was back to normal. And thankfully it is normal.

I had it easy, I did alright without anyone’s help, but I have heard and know of the things that a lot of school kids go through these days and I would suggest, it is best to seek counsel and not to be embarrassed of anything. Just speak out and someone will hear you and reach out to you, for you are never alone – Never.

Yes, NO.

Mentor Me:  Have you ever had a mentor? What was the greatest lesson you learned from him or her?

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Every one has taught me something, or may be I learned from people who were not even trying to teach anything. I guess that is called getting influenced – you get so impressed, followed by obsessed that you want to be like someone or do a thing in a certain way.

But mentor nope! none, except my nana. And she too mostly advises on life, as in the way of things, but everyone has some one like that who sets them straight, shows them the direction etc etc. I am grateful for that, but then the generation gap brings me to a standstill in situations that are new not just to her or me but to the entire world.

In times like that and in matters so forward you do need an advisor and, that I do not not have. So, like my title the answer is – Yes, No. Yes, I learn from many but, No I do not necessarily always get a helping hand. The following two links are to the older/similar posts asking us about our heroes and best teachers, I think a mentor does come in the same category.